The lives of women in academia are complex. What adds to this complexity is society’s expectations. Women in academia are expected to juggle multiple aspects of their lives at once, somehow finding the perfect ‘balance’. Finding this balance is often not spoken about in faculty board meetings or addressed in university policy. It is assumed that women should know how to work efficiently, fulfil requirements stipulated in performance management contracts and be a mother. In this research the author provides a reflective commentary overviewing her own journey as a female doctoral student who became a mother for the first time during the COVID19 pandemic and share her experiences with being a female in academia. By exploring this journey, motherhood is unpacked from the perspective of a doctoral student who was already experiencing a variety of pressures. This research addresses aspects such as unrealistic timelines to produce research outputs but also speaks to the resilience of women in academia to perform against all odds and to rise above challenges in order to fill key leadership positions that could encourage other women to do the same.

Keywords: Higher education, post-graduate studies, motherhood, COVID-19.